Mourning the Summer That Isn't

My mind is on our impending doom the husband's deployment.  
Preparing for it is like going through the Kübler-Ross Model, or five stages of grief.

1. Denial: "Uh, I don't think so..." "Didn't you just go on a deployment?" "Surely they've made a mistake, let's not get excited until the paperwork is in your hand".

2. Anger: At everybody and everything.

Towards Hubby: "Are you flippin' kidding me?! What about _____ and_______ and ________ who have never been deployed in their whole career?!"

Towards insensitive RS President: "No, I am NOT ok with you changing my VT route and companion so that I now have to drive 15 minutes to get her (she doesn't drive) and then an additional 35 minutes to the people I am supposed to visit while my husband is away."

Towards the Military: "What about our camping trip, beach plans--all of our summer?" "What about our Pantomime tickets already booked?"

Towards Flaky Hubby: "So, you are deploying in a couple of weeks, but still managing to take time off to do a hike with your buddy?" "Really?!"

Towards Football Coach: "You have NOT divided the team fairly for these 5-a-sides. Yes, I know you have one strong defender, 2 strong midfielders and a strong striker on each of your two teams but that's not the point!"

Towards random strangers: "Why are those kids staring at me, haven't they ever seen a woman smash the front end of her car before?!"

(anger hung around longer than the other stages)

3. Bargaining: "Fine, so you go away for another 6 months and I'll go home". "Yes, I know that I will be alone at "home" just as I'm alone here, but that's not the point (nor is the fact that there isn't a "home" any longer since we've been moving for the last 15 years)."
"I need more scrapbooking paper to ease my pain...and Wii Zumba".

4. Depression: "I'll get out of bed when I'm ready, pass the chocolate please".

5. Acceptance: "I'm going to be ok, I can't change it so I will have to accept it". "We'll take one bite of the elephant at a time..."

I won't say which stage I am on now, but I can tell you that my mind is distracted (thus the little fender bender between me and an embankment only days before my car was supposed to sell). I'm having a hard time focusing and "being in the moment" which is sad for the kids...

Miss Ky was not in school on Monday, she was home with me. OMGosh that girl can talk! I didn't want to be short with her, but at one point I thought that if she didn't shut up soon, my head was going to blow into a billion abstract bits all over my house.
My thoughts are on automobiles, tv taxes, car taxes, the pool winterizing I'll have to do on my own, Number One Son in Tech school and his wife in Arizona, school fees that hit hard when we got back from the states and older, established trees dying left and right in my garden due to the drought we're suffering...not the constant ramblings of a four-year old.

I decided that the best thing to do with little Miss Chatterbox was put her to work.

"Miss Ky, how about you come out and help me in the garden, would you like to move the water to the apple tree for me?"

"Okay!!! I'm going to get my shoes! I'm wearing my school shoes because if I wear my sparkly shoes they might get mud on them Livvy wears her sparkly shoes to school sometimes and she takes her bike, I want to take my bike to school because I'm a big girl and I don't need a helmet because I can ride with one hand...."
and she sets herself smack on my heels, following me out the door... singing.

"Weee're going to move the water! Weee aaare going to moooove the waaaahhaaahhhaaater, we're moving the waaaater, we are going to move the waaaahaaater..."
She sings for the mile and half (slight exaggeration) we have to walk to where the hose sits.
Then she picks up the hose and turns to me to ask, "Which apple tree do you want me to water?" as she soaks my legs.

We can do this, some days are just going to be a lot less fun than others.

Regrets

I didn't know the world was ending tomorrow. No one told me. If I had known, I would have lived the last couple of days differently.

I wouldn't have done all of that laundry.

I wouldn't have freaked out when our expired car loan approval (not our fault our car got held up at the ports) meant that we were going to go from 4% to 11% to have it renewed.

I would have eaten chocolate all day and skipped the healthy stuff.

I certainly wouldn't have spent the last available sunshine editing photos for some one's retirement party-- what does he care if they're put on a disc if there's no tomorrow for him to see them?





My poor son. He'll never get his honeymoon.

Texas stores, Jo Ann's and Michaels?


I don't know...

would I have thrown all caution to the wind and bought everything I fancied?
Or would I have not even bothered since I can't use any of the stuff anyway?

I want it all!!

Why not 60% off? The world is ending anyway.

Here's where I have no regrets:
all of those people who kept saying they would come visit me... I told you not to put it off!




What are you doing with your last day?

Postcards From No Rest For The Wearyville

Wednesday:Yes, I AM willing to drive for miles looking for a Michaels or Joann's, why do you ask?

Thursday: having a great time, wish you were here... well, maybe not for the horrific storm bit that spawned a tornado and totally threw the military ceremonies into chaos, but for the rest of it.

Ihop is currently our home away from home and I'm enjoying the toilet seat covers and classic rock on the radio!

I teared up when the AF briefing listed Son #1 as an Honor Graduate.
I frowned when the Airman's Run was cancelled for rain, worried when the storm rolled in, threatening to cancel the Coin Ceremony.

Note for the AF: If you place hundreds of excited parents in a BX during a storm, they will be talking too much to hear your drive-by announcement to "seek shelter immediately" and may mistake it for "Please move back to the Reception Center immediately", therefore arriving to a blackened room soaking wet to enjoy meeting a few more hundred family members holding their phones as flashlights.

Finally, we made it into a cafeteria that still had power and after acknowledging the accomplishments of the airman and applauding #1 for his Honors, I was taken back to the relief, joy and pride of his birth 22 years ago when he embraced me in the biggest hug I have ever received.





I then had the privilege of shopping with him for a ring...



K-girl got here just an hour before he had to report back to his dorm.

I hope my cankles go away before tomorrow!



Friday: Another 4am start since it's too hot to sleep. Why is our room so hot?

7.10 we started making our way to the parade grounds. K-girl and her dad make it to us at 8.30-I can relax again (no relaxing for Dad who I forced to wear his uniform).

9.00 the ceremony begins

and by 9.40, K-girl got to "tap out" (release him from standing at attention).

He got down on one knee and offered her the ring...

Lunch at Red Lobster (his favorite) was followed by a frantic tour of downtown San Antonio to find Command Seargent Major Don to marry them.


By 4 pm, I am the proud owner of a new daughter.

Quick stop by the Alamo, why not? We're here...

Seriously, why is our room so hot?

7:30 pm Raised the white flag, so now we've moved rooms to one that actually has air conditioning and look forward to some sleep... after we have Mexican food downtown.
I hope the massive blister on my foot goes away soon.

Having the best holiday ever, wish you were here!




I'd like to officially welcome K-girl to the blog, where all privacy goes out the window. Thank you for standing by J1 for all of these years. For holding his hand when his heart was broken, even though doing it was breaking yours. Thank you for being his friend when he was too blind to see that there was no one else who could lift him the way you do. Thank you for loving my son and for agreeing to marry into our crazy family. We love you!!

Things Americans Take For Granted

1. Sonic Cherry Limeade
2. Crushed ice in a Sonic Cherry Limeade
3. Seeing American flags waving from every city block
4. Ihop
5. Sunsets
6. Strangers striking up conversations in a bathroom
7. Showers that blast the top layer of skin away
8. M&M's in new flavors
9. Craft Stores that go on forever and ever
10. Did I mention Cherry Limeade?

Gooooood Morning USA,

We're back on American soil!

After traveling for 17 hours (drive to London, airport sitting time, layovers and plane transfers), we arrived in San Antonio exhausted (I was sporting some lovely cankles from sitting so long), but excited.

We spent about an hour driving around looking for our room-- on the wrong side of the road, so it was never boring, and another hour looking for food.
After dreaming of a great American sit-down meal all week, we settled for Whattaburger (and it took all the willpower I had not to load up on milkshakes and apple pies).

Today, Hubby and I could not sleep past 4 am, so it looks like a tour of Walmart is in order... or maybe a stop by the Alamo before the tourists get there.

Whatever the day holds for us, nothing can compare to tomorrow when we'll see our #1 Son as an Airman for the first time.

It.s a great day!

Yea Though I Walk...

... through valleys and mountains.

This has been an incredible couple of weeks, hasn't it?

UP: I spent five hours sitting in front of a television mesmerized by a fairytale wedding,

obviously not my photo, don't know who to credit though...

DOWN: and the weekend worrying about a little boy's swollen ankle...

 

UP: There was a proud afternoon as Miss Ky decided she would now ride her bike without stabilizers--and she did, brilliantly!

 

UH: An emotionally strange feeling at the death of a terrorist... (No, Miss Ky is still alive and well, thank you)





UP: THE OVERWHELMING ELATION OF SEEING NORWICH CITY GET THE AUTOMATIC PROMOTION INTO THE PREMIERE LEAGUE!!! yes, I did cry-still an "UP" moment.

Norwich City desktop photos

 DOWN: and news that Mr. Sexy is going on "holiday". 

Again. 

He will miss "firsts" of a child going to school, another starting high school, birthdays, all upcoming holidays... yes, I did say "all".



UP: In one week I will "tap out" the other Air Force guy in my life. I have reason to believe that I will be gaining a daughter-in-law the very same weekend, but since AF guys are really quite good at keeping secrets,  I can neither confirm nor deny my suspicions at this time.

My emotional state is all over the place to say the least...

How's your week been?