Disarming a Dislocation Disorder

Wow,

what is it with (blog) construction workers? This blog went under construction nearly two months ago and there's no further progress than there was then. Can't get good help these days.

Let's not dwell on the "what isn't" and just move on to the "what is" for the sake of your eyes and my carpal tunnel, shall we?

So, the 2nd month anniversario of our residency on Terceira is about to commence and holy smokes, I can't believe how quick the time is passing!

There's always a bit of a 'dislocation disorder' that comes with every move, and unfortunately, this one has been extreme. Boo-hoo-leave-me-alone-I'm-eating-this-pound-sized-bag-of-M&Ms extreme.

I've considered divorce, adopting out my children, running away from home and permanently becoming a non-showering recluse. Anyone who knows me IRL, knows this is a symptom and not characteristic of...well, maybe the desire to run away is normal, but the rest- I kind of like showers and these people I am forever bound to.
Perhaps it was leaving such great friends and fabulous country, perhaps it's the fact that we'll just be recovering from the move when we'll get our next duty station information, I don't know, but it has sucked. The worst part is, I really do love it here, depression? I ain't got time for that.


 It helps to get out and experience the glorious circumstances in which we find ourselves here in the Açores. It's so incredibly beautiful and if you can manage to avoid the base and the people who live closest to it (who are a little jaded and fed up with the "American experience"), your arm might end up quite bruised from pinching yourself so often to make sure it's not just a dream.

We're landing! After a looooong journey, it's so good to see we've finally arrived.

I'm not the only one who has had enough of plane transfers

But then, there's the hot, crowded bus to take us from the plane to the terminal...

Our home until we get a home

The Açores experience high winds in the winter. This should be proof: concrete road signs. This little disaster-seeking bean is anxiously awaiting for the time when we can put him up against a chain link fence and the wind will hold him there.

Add caption

 I'm not thinking, "OMGosh I have cute kids and everyone should see pics of them. I'm showing that our walk to the swimming pool is still in view of the ocean. This is where you say, "oooooh, ahhhh".

One of the great things about being LDS is that we pretty much have a church anywhere we go. When we lived here before (when the goofy teen was only a 1 year old), our branch was Portuguese and American. Now they've divided into two branches- something I find quite sad).

We instantly got stuck in (I wonder if I'll ever drop my British colloquialisms?) and took Little Miss Ky out to our favourite swimming hole in Quatro Ribeiras while her brothers went to a Soccer (futbol!) camp on base.

This is a little trick I've learned over the years: Put a child (or three) in front of your thighs so you don't have to continue editing yourself out of photos. I do need the teens to cover the double chin though...

Incredible, isn't it?

 Horizontal

Vertical

still beautiful 

(anyone ever wonder how my iPhoto library has become so big? 

Now you know why).

That pool you see by the building is a salt-water pool. It comes in handy if you have little guys that you don't want swept out with the tide, or for days like today where the jelly fish are the ones taking advantage of the lava pools.

I'm betting the stairs and handrails of this swimming hole were installed quicker than I've revamped In the Gutter.

Because I have lost your trust with my sporadic posting of late, I will assure you that I have several posts queued up waiting for automatic publishing. My therapy. That, "count your blessings" kind of therapy that seems to always work.

Please check back in when you regain use of your eyes soon for two months worth of sightseeing photos (the equivalent of sitting in our living room and being subjected to our holiday slideshow, only with no popcorn).



Until then,

ADEUS!

Moving Forward

We've become spoiled with this 'little holiday' in Great Britain. Most military assignments have us moving around on average every two years. In July, we will have been here seven glorious years. The U.K. will forever remain my home away from home. I'm heartbroken to leave it.

However, if we weren't open to new adventures, we never would have signed up for this life. Believe me, the "perks" aren't all they're cracked up to be. Free health care means long waiting times for appointments. Overseas health/dental care for dependents...  well, we're all alive.

But I digress... as usual.

We've received our next assignment and with great joy, I can tell you that beginning in August 2013, In The Gutter will be reporting from the third largest island in the 9-Island Azorean chain, Terceira.
We're going back to the the island we loved and to the local Portuguese friends we've missed these past 12 years.

It takes some of the sting out of leaving England.

Since you dropped by, let me get out my slides and bore you with some very outdated photos!

 Ok, I did mention they were poor photos, right? I don't think we had a digital camera yet (much less a DSLR). These were probably from our 8mm video camera.



The brightly coloured buildings are Holy Ghost Houses

 Our first house in Quatro Ribeiras where
we met our lovely friends, The Lopes Family.

Since the winds often get to hurricane force, the windows have metal shutters to protect the glass. We lose power several times a week which makes for great Monopoly games by candlelight.

 Villa Nova. Renowned for burgers that taste exactly like a Big Mac. May not seem like a big deal to you, but when you've gone 2-3 years with nothing that tastes like what you grew up with, they're heavenly.
We're not usually 'fast food' people, but we like a fun little family outing now and again to enjoy something so not good for us.




Twice a year, the base flies in Burger King and they open up their operation for one day in the school. People queue up around the building for a taste from home.

Oldest boy, J1 in front of a Holy Ghost house. The boy and his wife are desperate to join us and we still wait to see if he got an assignment there on this cycle...

  The island is VERY small. There's very few places you can be and not see the ocean.

The Portuguese have great respect for the ocean. We were warned never to go near it when it "is angry".

C Lopes with J2

Swimming holes are pools protected naturally by lava rock, with steps and handrails added. We swim with the fish. Sometimes we don't swim when the jellyfish take over...

 Rainbows are frequent. 

I saw my first circle rainbow from the top of the island just before we left in 2001

Our dear friends, The Lopes and baby A1. We're in N. Lopes Carpentry shop where he was custom designing our bed...

The finished product. It's African Cherry wood-gorgeous-and the movers broke it when we moved here. The repairs were expensive and shoddy, so we're looking forward to N putting it right.

N and A Lopes working on the 8-seater table our friends had made.

Wow, you're still here?

If you suffered through that, then surely you won't mind the next 7 months that I'll need to spend catching up with all of our great experiences here in England? 

Somebody pinch me. We're going back to the Azores!!

Into the Weekend

I am such a slug when it comes to posting anymore. I've had so many things to share!

Like how I celebrated the final arrival of this:

No, not the child responsible for most of my gray hair, I meant Pool time!

Spring!



Also I needed to thank you all for your very kind and supportive comments and pass on the news that #1 Son's records are officially sealed, YAY! (there's still the matter that it occurred and it could still hold him back, but I'm hanging onto the "sealed" part).

There's also the opportunity to eat my words.

I wonder what nagging actually tastes like?

You know that "Behind every great man..." quote? Well, I take this "great woman" responsibility very seriously, so I nagged like nobody when the Hubby was supposed to be preparing for his Master Sergeant test.

I pestered him when I thought he spent too much time on his iphone. I vexed him when he did ridiculous internet searches for hours and I scolded him when he played "See how long it takes me to flip through all 600 channels on the telly".

He didn't study.

I really told him off shared my concerns afterward and may have mentioned how even though the pay raise would have helped us on our astronomic rent, I wouldn't say "I told you to study".
I may have mentioned that I wouldn't feel sympathy for him not making it either.

Well Lucky Louie passed and is now a MSgts (that little "s" means select and he has a "line number" for when he gets to sew on that extra stripe).

What a great way to go into the Memorial Weekend.

I'm proud of the Sexy Guy and appreciate everything he does to provide the lifestyle that we, as Americans enjoy.

To all who served, are serving or will be serving, THANK YOU.


Last Year's 4th of July re-enlistment photos in Iraq

I have to go find some ketchup now to go with my humble pie.

Thievin' Thursday

I'm too busy watching American Idol to actually come up with a thought-provoking post (cough...must be watching AI all the time then, you think?), so I am thief-ing an email I sent to the Sexy Guy while he was deployed (wow, my g-rating--see the bottom of the page-- must really be plummeting with THAT word).
This email was sent to him as he waited for word on whether or not he was moving. I had started the morning with : "Dad's on the move!" and ended up saying, "Never mind, Dad's in the Hurry-up-and-wait stage".


5 Sept: It's just a really long story (and it wouldn't be very entertaining if I shortened it). Shoot, you have no where to be, so I'll try and see if Ky will let me get through this.

So, I decided to BBQ. It'd be fun, I could BBQ while the boys played in the yard-- so I decided to move the grill to the front garden--via that long hallway. Well, I asked A2 to open the door for me and I tipped up the thing and started wheeling it---I was walking backwards. Well, long ago, I took the mesh fencing off the big pond and put it over the little one, thinking Ky was more likely to fall in that one. So as I backed up, A1 failed to warn me that I was about to hit anything (He didn't notice) and the spiky bits ripped into my leg (luckily I had jeans on and it tore a hole in them and just scratched me) and I went down on my hand-- hard. It's bruised today-- didn't know hands could bruise. I stood up, took account of my jeans (whatta drag) and began again. Well A2 then decides to help by moving the fencing in a way that Ky will not only drown, but she'll get skewered along the way-- so, when he leaves, I decide to rearrange the fence and gouge the top of my foot-- it starts to bleed, so I went in to disinfect it (how long ago did I have a tetanus shot?) while the baby cries and the boys are all put out about watching her.

Back to the BBQ.
I put the charcoal in, knowing I was really wasting my time since the top had blown off the grill during the storm and everything (entire bag of charcoal) had gotten damp. I struggled to get it going while J2 paced around me upset that he has to hold Ky. I scoop all the coals out and start with a fresh bag. It lights right up, so I proceeded to shuck the corn to get it ready. I have already snapped at the boys for huffing about watching the baby-- J2 said, "Well you said you'd BBQ while we jumped on the trampoline, but we can't do that if we have to watch her!" So I told him, "Fine-- I just won't BBQ, I can't do it all".
Well, he now has her in the grass. I asked A2 to please set up the table with all of the condiments, but as I open the fridge....

Another story:
Ky loves baby meat sticks-- isn't that funny? I never gave the other kids any, but she loves them, so I buy them. Well, let me correct that.... she loves the first three of the bottle and eats them like a wild animal, but the rest, she tears apart and throws all over the floor, so... I refrigerate the remainder......


When I went to pull out something, that danged baby meat stick bottle fell out and in my attempt to catch it, I batted it across the kitchen floor. I watched it bounce (whew, no break) (but the lid did come off), bounce (yikes, still no break though), bounce bounce bounce-- all the while splashing meat juice up the cabinets, chair and table legs.

SO, I tell A1 to leave the kitchen and I begin cleaning. I have the meat on the grill, so I am beginning to panic a little. I also have on my mind: There's laundry that's hung all day that needs to come in before it rains, and clothes in the washer that may sour if I don't get them out soon, there's a plastic chair blocking my pathway in and out the door and, is the corn burning out there on the coals?
.... and then A1 says "Ky made a poo!" and they all start "eeeeewing" (which makes me wonder if it's oozing).
I change Ky, set her in her high chair and throw snacks at her so she can eat while she screams at me, flip the burgers (they're ok) and turn the corn. I rush back in to start the broccoli and begin taking things to the table.

Anyway, in the chaos, A1 went to his room and played a video game, A2 started pestering me to eat, and J2 was sprawled on the couch watching tv while Ky yelled at me.

It was enough. I'm tired and can't tell you the last time I sat and played a video game or watched the tellie un-interrupted. I told them, "That's it!" and packed up the burgers & bell peppers, put the uncooked hotdogs back in the fridge along with the corn and broccoli and then I sat down on the couch and watched "Everybody Loves Raymond".

They ate cereal.

I bet next time I go to do something they want, they'll be a little more considerate...

yeah, you're right, probably not.

I'm dying... we all are, some day

Here's the post I told Kari at I Struggle and Emerge I would do sometime over two weeks ago. And I have yet to play tag with Tammy at The Color of Home and pass on my shiny new award on here from Kathryn , one of my favorite reads. Only so many minutes in a curtain-climber packed day!

7 years, 7 months, 7 weeks, 7 days, 7 hours, 7 minutes to live!

7 years:

I would start traveling! Pompeii, Caribbean, Turkey, and every National Park in the U.S. I'd take the kids to Disney World for two weeks and let someone else clean up after us while we just laughed and played. I'd learn a foreign language and climb a mountain (a small one, I am in my forties, you know!). I'd start getting the stories behind the photos written down for the kids.
Sit in the audience for an Oprah Show (except when she's on her celebrity kick...), or Doctor Phil, or Deal or No Deal-- not yours, sorry, HATE Howie Mandel, but love Noel Edmunds over here. I'll eat in a Gordon Ramsay Restaurant on an evening when he's actually cooking.

7 months:

The panic sets in. I would make some letters or videos for the kids to have when they're older. Basically a "Things I wish I had known" thing with lots and lots of love and positive comments.
See every show in (on? at?) London's West End and on Broadway. I'd lie about my age and try out for American Idol (no, I can't sing), high-five Simon Cowell and tell Randy to stop saying "Yo dog", because it's aging him (and yes, I am SURE they'll believe I'm only 23).


7 weeks:

well, I'm going anyway, so I might as well lie on the beach with coconut oil containing only SPF 2 and tan away! I look so much better tanned. I would be super affectionate with my touchy-touchy husband. I don't like to be touched a lot (gee, I have had someone at my breast or hanging off of my leg every minute of every day for about 10 years now, I don't know why I don't like to be touched).
One of the days, I will sit by the window while the rain falls and read a good book and drink hot chocolate--without interruptions.
Go to the States and see my doggy. Bury my head in his fur until he gets tired of me hugging him.

I MISS MY DOG.

















7 days:

spend every moment talking to my family and friends, eating rich foods, and laughing. I'd be slaughtering everyone at Risk and NOT feeling bad about it.


7 hours:

sit with my family and take in the last sunrise and watch the last sunset (can be done in four hours here in the winter time) and teach my children to see the beauty we live in.

7 minutes:

Well, since I don't have to rush around and pack, I imagine the last 7 minutes would be hugs, a few tears and lots of kisses. AND I would remind my family, ONE MORE TIME, that I want a big party, not some sad, drippy funeral.

Are you up for the challenge? I'd love to see what you come up with, so please drop me a comment if you take and post this challenge.

Introductions Please!

I know it's still your Thursday, but it's almost my Friday -- and not to undervalue the importance of Bad Poetry Thursday, I am submitting my Friday post now (I have big dreams for Fridays).

I have never really introduced you to my family.

I hate writing in code (J1, J2 etc...). If no children were involved, I'd be putting out name, address, phone number, and inviting you over for a cuppa.

But as a military family, we have to practice OPSEC at all times.
So, all sickos, perverts and terrorists, please leave this blog now.

Ahhh, that's better, a little less crowded (there's 9 of you now).

Anyway, in order of appearance in my life:


There's J1 or Son #1 or 19-year old.

He's the proof that doctors don't know everything. His Dad and I were both told we would probably not make any chillin's. Anyway, J1 is here and his Dad went on to have two girls in another marriage and I, well, The Hubby and I are just short of a baseball team.
J1 is incredibly talented. He writes his own music and can play 40 different instruments. He's amazing on the trumpet, and equally impressive on the drums. He records his songs by playing every instrument and then mixing them. Someday, I will put one of his songs on here. He's amazing-- a little Tom Delong-ish He wants to be a Herpetologist. He lives with snakes. Um, that sounded bad because he's currently residing in my Mother's basement while waiting for his apartment application to be approved. I really meant the slithering, sometime poisonous things.

The Hubby.
He appeared after J1.

I was relieved that I now had someone to feel safe with. I could actually fall asleep and NOT listen for every little sound... until the night the dog vomited all over the carpet next to our bed and I cleaned it-- large with child, exhausted, crying and with the light on--right next to him and he never stirred. So much for feeling safe.
He's VERY romantic and an all around great guy, and a left-brainer (teetering on Nerdy). He spends just about every waking moment trying to make me happy... a little daunting and cool at the same time.

J2

10 years younger than J1. He's got deep chocolate-brown eyes that sparkle when he's happy and are also the first clues when he's coming down with something. He's a perfectionist and has to master anything he tries. He was a natural in baseball, but came to England and began obsessing with football. He's also pretty impressive with the trumpet. His older brother passed his down to him and the music director was so impressed with J2's musical abilities, he recommended an advanced group for him to play in once a week. This boy LOVES his sister!
J2's got a tender heart, but doesn't show his emotions. When he cries, I know something terrible is happening. He's got a girl. and he's 9.

A1

About the time J2 was born, I was blissfully hormonal and said, "Let's have another one!" So 18 months later, we did. Hubby's dad had made a comment, "What's with all the 'J's?" So this baby got an "A" name. I was flown off of an island in the Azores at 34 weeks pregnant and spent the next month alone in Maryland. During one of their worst winters. ever. Knowing NO ONE and not having a car. I had a red flag on my medical charts for depression during the pregnancy and yet was left alone.
"Stork Nesting" is another brilliant Air Force program that needs a little tweaking.
A1 is very sensitive. Loud sounds, bright lights, any angry talk would really upset him as a baby. He was hospitalized with severe jaundice on day 6, so had to undergo various tests as he got older to see if there was any damage. I have often wondered if maybe he has Aspergers. He ticks so many of the boxes. He has the kindest, sweetest soul, and he's a math whiz.

A2
Imp.

This is the one that I don't mind when he sneaks up to be in my bed. He loves to cuddle. He's a ham--very funny little guy. I spent the first year of his life worrying that something was wrong with him. His eyes are wider set than everybody else's and he just always had a "duh...." expression. I thought my "old eggs" had had an impact on the poor little fellow.
I quit worrying when I looked at some of his Dad's pictures and saw the same expression. He loves school and is well-liked by the other kids. He has a passive nature I think... well, sometimes. If a kid at school takes something from him, his expression is, "what the heck?" but then he'll turn and move on to something else. Not at home. He has the LOUDEST cry and can really throw a tantrum. We're gonna keep him anyway.

Miss Ky

Surprise! This is what God says to you when The Hubby says "Hey honey, we're moving to England and we'll want to travel a lot, so I think I'd better book the vasectomy".
Thank (Him) that He knows better than we do.
I hated comments like, "Will you try for a girl?" (as if my four boys were a disappointment). Even after her birth when people would say (in front of my other children) "Well, you finally got your girl! You must be so happy." I would cringe.
Yes, I finally got my girl that I didn't even know I wanted. I am enjoying her tremendously. Except when she's climbing, tearing things up, throwing important things away, pouring cereal on the floor...
She's a beautiful sleeper.
No really, this is the happiest baby I have ever had the privilege of knowing.

So, that's my family.
My pride and joy.
The demise of my lovely skin and
the cause of my greying hair.

Now maybe my stories will mean more to you.
Or maybe now you'll go join the others who left at the beginning.

The down side of being a military wife

This morning, determined NOT to be addicted to blogging, I decided I would only pull in my email and then shut this Mac-baby down for the day. Things never quite work out how we plan, do they? (Yikes, I just did the British "question thing!" how funny).

Any who, I had an email from Heidi, of Muddy H2O.

I discovered MH2O through one of my favorite blog sites, Getinthecar! Jen was having a give-away for a Chocolate face mask and well, if there's anything with chocolate involved, you can count me in! I immediately went searching for a place to order.

Living overseas can really be a great experience. However, when you're longing for a taste of home or in need of something that you can't find here, things can get a bit frustrating. Few places will ship to an APO address. What APO means is, you post the item to me. It travels to NY where the military takes over and sees it to it's final destination. You don't pay any more than if you were shipping to your Grandma, but you do have to fill out a customs slip-- which is mostly a check-the-box-and-sign type of form. You don't have to be a rocket scientist to figure it out, but it does take extra effort. Many Ebay sellers won't ship to APO, Target has never shipped anything to APO, Amazon can't send electronics or gourmet items (so much for belonging to the "Hot Sauce of the Month" club) and I once spent an entire day uploading 600 pictures to Walmart only to be told at check-out that they wouldn't ship photos to an APO. You try to figure why.

So, when I contacted the MH2O company directly and asked how I could get my hands on a chocolate Muddy, Heidi told me she would ship it to me personally-- in support of my husband serving in the military.
Regardless how you feel about the war or anything else with the military, you need to know that on a regular basis, we are bombarded by negativity from total strangers. Once on an Amazon chat, I noticed some idiot taking a verbal punch at a Veteran and even though I normally don't get involved with chats, I felt like I needed to this time. Needless to say, he then attacked me with comments about how joining the military was our choice or rather maybe we didn't have a choice (inferring I had a lack of education). Whatever, Einstein.
We did choose the military for reasons I won't go into here, and it's not always easy. The 15 months we have lived here in England, my husband has been away in one place or another for more than half of it. He has missed several birthdays, 4th of July celebrations, Thanksgiving, "Firsts" (like first day of school for two kids, baby milestones for two babies, teenage 'firsts' etc...). He has been gone when the house needed repairs, the tires have gone flat, vehicular accidents and most recently, for the High School Graduation and overseas move of our teenager.
I am proud of him. He works hard, loves his family and loves his country. So I really like people like Heidi that recognize him and the sacrifice he makes in serving our country.

Today's email from Heidi went something like this:

"I mailed your box this afternoon. I ran into a little wrinkle when I attempted to ship the package. I naively believed that if I sent your package via an APO address and you were an American citizen then the package would not be considered "export merchandise". Hooooo Weeeeee..... " "I got from the clerk a big, fat "You can't send this, Lady!"
'So, instead. I sent your package as a gift. Your Visa number has been shredded and will never see the light of day again. Please accept this gift from Muddy H2O as our show of appreciation for your husband serving in our military and your hard work at being "Mom" and "Wife". You deserve a little chocolate pampering.' "

Wow. I almost cried. I immediately thought, "What can I do to repay this lady who has never met me or my husband?"
And then it came to me.
All six of you reading this blog, no pressure, but what I am hoping you will do is 1.) If you've EVER done a facial in your entire life, would you please support this company and try one of theirs? They even have single packets, so you don't have to break the bank with this. and 2.) Could you send the link to every warm-blooded being you know so that THEY will support this company? They have retailers all through the West (that will ship to the East, not sure about Canada though, Tara).
If you're not sold on this product, click here to read Jen's account. Her HUSBAND noticed.....

Gotta love the Military...

The hubby is STILL not home. The contracted bus that was supposed to bring him on the 15 hour journey home apparently broke down before he ever got on it. At this point, you'd think the Air Force would just put these tired, homesick folks on one of the many military planes flying straight here, but no-- that's not how it works. Instead, they waited around for a few hours and now are slated to arrive around 3 or 4 am. That wouldn't be so bad if I didn't have 5 kids here and his drop off point wasn't an hour away. But, since it is the busiest traveling day of the year in this part of the world and there's freezing fog scheduled (freezing fog, it's amazing to see), I am not even getting worked up over this. I figure I'll pick the man up tomorrow.
And just for your enjoyment,
here's a shot of normal fog on our
little country road.
Do you see the horses?
You may have to click on the image :-)