Tonight he is reclining on the sofa. Feeling a little bad about the big crack on his iPhone from today's drop in the driveway. Watching football.
I had cooked dinner, helped two small kids make a dessert. Cleaned up. Prepared our Family Home Evening. Loaded the dishwasher after dinner. Began finally sorting out the paper mountain we accumulated over December when I was too busy to sort mail and school papers coming in by the tons.
Feeling a little guilty (neglectful), thinking Husband might need my calming, comforting presence, I sit down on the love seat and look at him sympathetically as he strokes his phone.
"I need to go back on the Wii Fit, that was really great the other day", he says with that dreamy look one gets after having a tropical holiday. "It's a really great workout, have you been on there lately?"
insert dramatic pause...
...you know, the one I should have taken...
before going into my tirade. (bless him, never saw any of this coming)
"Are you serious?! WHEN would I go on to the Wii? If I'm not cooking, cleaning, folding laundry or basically meeting everybody's needs, this TV is tuned into football or some ridiculous Disney Channel show that makes me want to gouge my eyes out and if the Wii is actually up and running, someone is playing FIFA!!"
quick breath... the kind you're trained to do as a singer... (bless him, never saw any of this coming)
"I don't ever have time to do anything like that and for the life of me, do NOT know how you fit it in this weekend while I was away! Housework around here is never done, the kids are always up to something..."
Somehow I don't think that's what he ever expected when he started that conversation. (bless him, never saw any of this coming) I think he may have even been holding onto some delusion of me patting his head saying, "Poor Little Bunny, you are putting on such a brave face speaking about workouts when your iPhone-obsessed heart is broken".
I'd love to say he won't bring it up again,
but he will.
Husbands can say some really dumb things sometimes.
:-)
ReplyDeleteI always recommend -- as I clean houses on the weekends, here and there -- that having someone come in and do the big cleaning twice a month. If you can afford it, it really does take a load off.
And yes -- they do say some amazing things...
Pearl
yeah, with all your spare time, maybe you should work out more. or perhaps build him a small aircraft from spare parts you harvested from a nearby junk yard. cuz ya know, you were just sitting around on your butt doing nothing & should really find a hobby.
ReplyDeleteMine excels at it. He could give lessons. :)
ReplyDeleteI suppose it would be too much to ask that he would lovingly turn to you and say, "I'll watch the kids, you go take an hour or two to yourself. I know it's hard and I really appreciate all you do." Yeah, it would never happen here either.
"How unusual"
ReplyDeleteMine likes to laze around on weekends, trashes the kitchen and lounge room then naps while I clean it all up. Then complains that I'm boring because I'm wrecked at the end of the day. WTF?!
ReplyDeleteThey sure can. I call it "manbrain."
ReplyDelete"...you know, the one I should have taken..." totally cracked me up.
Yep. Mine too. I don't know why they have such a difficult time seeing the whole picture.
ReplyDeleteThat is really funny! I am going to have to show this to my husband because he will appreciate knowing that he is not the only husband to say really dumb things sometimes!
ReplyDeleteOh Yeah. Welcome to my world, lol. Sorry. But they are, after all, just men. Bless their pointed little heads. I will be so thrilled when football season is over...
ReplyDeleteLAUGH*LAUGH*gasp*gasp*LAUGH*LAUGH ...
ReplyDeleteYES, he will bring it up again. And NO, he won't see it coming then either. (And YES, I will laugh again next time.)
Thanks for always bringing a reliably smile-inducing post to the blogdom.
You crack me up!!!! : D
Love you!
Thank god mine doesn't like football, soccer, or any other activity that involves sweaty men and balls. He actually cooks and takes care of the kids while I go work out...and he's mine, all mine! :D
ReplyDeleteI am sure he will be down the pub now, chatting with his mates and saying 'you'll never guess what she did now', whilst they all pat him on the back and groan about the unusual folk that are women!! I know coz ordinarily I'd be at the bar with them and nodding in agreement! ;)
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ReplyDeletePoor guy...he just never saw it coming. I am sure his head is still confused!! Ha!!
ReplyDeleteOn a side note...get a housekeeper to come in like Pearl said. I have someone come twice a month. Oh my!! Can you say BLISS!! It is worth it for sure!!
Mine has learned better...though he does have some slip ups...after almost 40 years he thinks before he speaks, helps with cooking and laundry and never complains if I don't get to something around the house.
He is a keeper now!! Ha!
Hugs
SueAnn
It's the testosterone...makes 'em stupid.
ReplyDeleteMen! When will they ever learn?
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ReplyDelete