6 am

The phone shrilled me awake. I bolted from the bed to stop the ringing before it disturbed the bed guest that had joined me at 3 am (I am cursing the day I converted Miss Ky's crib to toddler bed).
On the other end was Son #1 in hysterics. Literally, hysterics. Through sounds that sounded like a cross of maniacal laughter and wailing I waited for the words, "I've shot myself" or "I cut myself". He couldn't complete a full word other than "Mom?!".

I kept calmly saying, "Take a breath, J1 I need you to calm down and tell me what's happened because you're scaring me" and he responded, "I....I....I...".

This is the life I lead with a child who won't get professional help.

Apparently young girlfriend hasn't been all she's been telling him (didn't we all know she was lying?).
The thing about youth, it makes you stupid and you do stupid things, like post photos all about the guy you're seeing behind another guy's back for the last two months.

I asked, "She wasn't smart enough to block you from MyFarce?"
"She did, but she didn't block the band's account" (clever boy).

So it's a toss up. Fly to the states to kick her useless little hind end myself or hire a hit man. I don't know any hit men, but I'm figuring with today's economy, there are plenty of people wanting a little cash. Ok, for the sake of the one fool that thinks I might be dangerous to a teenage girl, we all know I wouldn't really do this right?

Mothers, "train up your (daughters) in the way she should (be honest)". Please teach them that the words, "You deserve someone better than me" aren't always the best words to extricate oneself from a relationship one has lost interest in.

Young dating-aged woman, young men are like puppies. If you stroke their egos and show them affection occasionally, they will follow you anywhere. They are blind to your cruelness and will eagerly accept your apologies after neglect. You'd never kick a puppy in the face, so don't do it to a young man either.

I'll get off my soap box now. That's what I do on three hours of sleep, I preach. I tell everyone how to rear their children and ramble on a blog that has somehow attracted spammers from China (go away useless scum)(readers from China are always welcome, spam not so much so).
Now if you'll excuse me, I am going to try to nap before I have to pick up Things 2-4 from their football camp so that I can feed them and drag them all to Thing 2's football training. I live the enviable life.