Worst Military Support Award Goes To...*

TarJay! or for you English-only speakers, Target.

*Best Military Support still goes to MuddyH20 you can read why, here.

You've heard me whinge before about this company because it wouldn't ship to military (Not the Muddy one -- they have my undying devotion, and I would be THRILLED if you'd check them out).
It was during the crazed search for the Eric Carle bedding that the 4 year-year old wanted desperately. I ended up paying a small fortune to have it shipped to someone and then shipped again to me.
I understand there are restrictions. No foods, no large items, etc... all sites have the same policy, but it was a kid's twin comforter for Pete's sake.

But just for the hey of it, (ok, I needed some retail therapy), I went out to that famous red bull's eye and put in my information again... and do you know what?

Not only did they have the appropriate pull-down menus for me to choose a state and a
zip code (WOW), but they also had this sweet little message for family members of military members stationed overseas:

"Shipping Restrictions Most products at Target.com can be shipped to all 50 states, as well as APO and FPO addresses (oh yeah, come to mama!) and Puerto Rico. However, there are a few restrictions: • APO/FPO orders are shipped via standard delivery only. (I'm ok with that) • Heavy or oversized products can be shipped only to the continental 48 states. They cannot be shipped to APO/FPO addresses. This will be indicated on the product description page. • Food, candy and chocolate cannot be shipped to APO/FPO addresses (know why? Because the chocolate we get here is FAR better). We do ship these items to all 50 states. For delivery to warm climates, all orders are shipped Mondays through Thursdays with a gel pack, to ensure their arrival in premium condition. • Certain items can only be shipped to the continental 48 states via standard delivery, and cannot be shipped to APO/FPO addresses. This will be indicated on the product description page. (SNEAKY little disclaimer I missed the first read thru)... Shipping to friends and family serving overseas can seem foreign. On our site, it's easy...".

Isn't that cool? Not.
Wow, you were sucked in as bad as I was, "Oh, T, you're so cool to make ordering so easy..."

Seriously, because I was needing therapy,

Toss, went a new duvet cover in my basket...
I checked the description, "We're sorry, this item cannot ship to P.O. boxes".

Huh? oh. ok. I'll just keep trying to get that lipstick out of my white one.

Wellies! I could use some mucking about boots since J2 sent mine swimming...
I found purple ones. "We're sorry, this item cannot ship to P.O. boxes".

Ummmm....ok. Miss Ky is starting swim lessons in March, how about an Ariel or princess swimsuit? "We're sorry, this item cannot ship to P.O. boxes".

I begin to frantically and randomly choose things: women's shoes, "We're sorry...", women's swimwear, "We're sorry...", women's T-shirts, "We're sorry...", Men's dress shirts, "We're sorry..." Baby clothes, "We're sorry..."

Alright, Tar-get-not, YOU tell me. What can overseas military order from your site?

That's what I asked them. This is what they replied:

"We can ship most items to APO or FPO addresses.

Just check the shipping information in the product description to see if we can ship the item you're looking for; it will let you know if we can't. For the most part, we can send any product on Target.com to an APO/FPO address except:

-Heavy or oversized products
-Food, including candy
-Items that are shipped directly from the manufacturer
-Some cosmetics and fragrances
Keep in mind that any APO or FPO order can only be shipped by standard U.S. mail."

They also asked , "How did we do?"

So I told them, as you knew I would
"Not very well, I am perfectly capable of reading your shipping policy, but when I tried to order things, not ONE thing was available to me".
I also told them that I think they must've gotten a lot of heat for not supporting the troops and added this information to their site as a facade (I'm fired up, can you tell?).

This is what they replied to THAT email:

I'm sorry for any confusion about where we ship. While we can't accept orders for international addresses, we can ship most items to APO or FPO addresses. Just check the shipping information in the product description to see if we can ship the item you're looking for; it will let you know if we can't. For the most part, we can send any product on Target.com to an APO/FPO address except:

-Heavy or oversized products
-Food, including candy
-Items that are shipped directly from the manufacturer
-Some cosmetics and fragrances
Keep in mind that any APO or FPO order can only be shipped by standard U.S. mail.

Wow. That was like Deja vu. I know I have a slipping memory and I slept between the email responses, but even I caught that this was a standard cut and paste email.

How's that for quality customer service?

*Note: Most restrictions are NOT the fault of the merchants, they are bound by law and the limits imposed on them by the Military Post Office.

• Packages may not exceed 70 lbs. (Some zip codes have lower limits)
• Packages may not exceed 130 inches in combined length and girth. (This means if you have a package that is 100" in length and 40" when you measure around it, you cannot send the item)
• All packages must be sent via the U.S. Postal System. The post office also requires companies or individuals to hand deliver packages being sent to APO/FPO addresses. (This is one reason why many merchants won't ship to APO/FPO addresses.)
• Firearms, alcohol, perishable foodstuffs and certain hazardous items also are restricted. Each zip code has a more detailed list of the restrictions for certain types of products. So everyone stop trying to send me guns baked into cakes-- oh, and this brings up a really good point. NEVER, EVER write "stuffed animal" on a customs slip coming to the UK. You will be taken literally and the package will fall into the black hole at the customs office. "Stuffed toy" will suffice.

You're an educated lot, you tell me--
where do Wellies and a Little Mermaid swimsuit fit in any of those categories?

I do have something special coming...
and I didn't order it.

Apparently the Hubby's been needing some retail therapy as well....

This post was brought to you by blogger's scheduler and was written before the "red porsche" arrived. That is the Hubby's retail therapy I was referring to.